A player stole a chip (1 Viewer)

JScott

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So this isn't really a post asking for advice since I already know what I'm doing about it, more of a minor rant. But I always host, even when not the "host". I bring my chips, sometimes table, the cards, manage the bank and even deal for the game if I'm feeling up for it. I always told everyone "don't take a chip, if you want one, ask and I'll try to get you a sample set, but I don't want to be short at the end of the night" and they all laugh it off like it's unnecessary to even say.

Well, over drinks the other days one of my newer regulars mentioned that one of the guys took a souvenir. He didn't want to say at first and be labelled a rat, but we convinced him it was worse to steal from a friend than rat out a friend. To my surprise it was one of my good friends, who's using the chip as a golf ball marker. It's a show'em chip I got from BRpro poker so not a huge loss as I can replace easily, and I have many others. Funny enough I hadn't even noticed it was missing as they were new, I only have 10 of that kind, and just kept them in my bank box. Probably wouldn't have noticed for a while if not told. The thing is, I would have gladly given him one, or all of them had he asked for a golf ball marker, and just ordered another 10, but now I'm pretty pissed as it show a complete lack of respect for not just me, but the effort I've put into hosting great games.

I can't confront him just yet as I don't want to throw the buddy who told me under the bus, so my plan is to just not invite him to games anymore, and be clear to my other players that if you steal, you're banned. I also have to warn some of the other golfers apparently now as I don't want them to think it's a free for all on my chips. If the chip thief asks me to host a game at his, or why he's not invited anymore, I'll let him know why and somehow protect the friend who told me... He'll be pissed and think I'm overreacting over a $1 chip, but I'm annoyed he put me in this position in the first place.

I also throw one of, if not the best, game in town, so it's no small deal being banned. And over this:

pinupshowem_360x.png
 

TKEUofM

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You are 100% in the right. Even if it's just for a golf ball marker it's an ethics situation. Players should understand that any chip should not be taken for either integrity of the bank or it being personal property of the owner. Like you said, if he really wanted it, he should have talked to you about it or you could have pointed him in the right direction to have custom ones made himself. Friends should not be stealing anything from each other no matter how little the value may be.
 

ekricket

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You are 100% in the right. Even if it's just for a golf ball marker it's an ethics situation. Players should understand that any chip should not be taken for either integrity of the bank or it being personal property of the owner. Like you said, if he really wanted it, he should have talked to you about it or you could have pointed him in the right direction to have custom ones made himself. Friends should not be stealing anything from each other no matter how little the value may be.
Lol, here’s a whole thread about it

https://www.pokerchipforum.com/threads/morals-ethics-legalities-or-hardcore-chip-harvesting.76892/
 

surfik

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Been there. Up to you but I would repremend him in front of everyone. If he will apologize, let him play. If he talk back just tell him to hit the road. People should be greatful and appreciate your effort.
But that is totally up to you...
 

JScott

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Bummer. I'd probably message the group, saying that a chip has gone missing, give the guy a chance to come clean.

I’d give him a chance, maybe he thought you said it was ok. It’s not like he’s hiding it.
maybe send a note out saying you counted your bounties and was short one, just in case someone thought it was ok to keep them and not redeem.
I’ve made it very clear not to take chips. That’s the issue. This is not a new player, and one of my closer friends, so close that when the guy said someone had one of my chips and wasn’t telling me, I said “well it’s definitely not xxx”. So yeah, a shock.
 
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Just talk to your friend. If you guys are really close just say, "Hey, dumbass, just ask next time!" I have an open fridge policy for beers, food (unless labeled by wifey) during poker nights, so my friends know it's ok to grab whatever. So maybe your friend thought you wouldn't care about "cheap" chips? Either way I know it's the feeling of being disrespected that really matters, so again, go talk to your buddy and if he's still being nonchalant about it then fill the room with uppercuts.
 

Saoliver

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I’ve made it very clear not to take chips. That’s the issue. This is not a new player, and one of my closer friends, so close that when the guy said someone had one of my chips and wasn’t telling me, I said “well it’s definitely not xxx”. So yeah, a shock.
Maybe he will get the message when he doesn't get an invite anymore. But I'm passive aggressive. :)
 

Sambukan

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So this isn't really a post asking for advice since I already know what I'm doing about it, more of a minor rant. But I always host, even when not the "host". I bring my chips, sometimes table, the cards, manage the bank and even deal for the game if I'm feeling up for it. I always told everyone "don't take a chip, if you want one, ask and I'll try to get you a sample set, but I don't want to be short at the end of the night" and they all laugh it off like it's unnecessary to even say.

Well, over drinks the other days one of my newer regulars mentioned that one of the guys took a souvenir. He didn't want to say at first and be labelled a rat, but we convinced him it was worse to steal from a friend than rat out a friend. To my surprise it was one of my good friends, who's using the chip as a golf ball marker. It's a show'em chip I got from BRpro poker so not a huge loss as I can replace easily, and I have many others. Funny enough I hadn't even noticed it was missing as they were new, I only have 10 of that kind, and just kept them in my bank box. Probably wouldn't have noticed for a while if not told. The thing is, I would have gladly given him one, or all of them had he asked for a golf ball marker, and just ordered another 10, but now I'm pretty pissed as it show a complete lack of respect for not just me, but the effort I've put into hosting great games.

I can't confront him just yet as I don't want to throw the buddy who told me under the bus, so my plan is to just not invite him to games anymore, and be clear to my other players that if you steal, you're banned. I also have to warn some of the other golfers apparently now as I don't want them to think it's a free for all on my chips. If the chip thief asks me to host a game at his, or why he's not invited anymore, I'll let him know why and somehow protect the friend who told me... He'll be pissed and think I'm overreacting over a $1 chip, but I'm annoyed he put me in this position in the first place.

I also throw one of, if not the best, game in town, so it's no small deal being banned. And over this:

View attachment 738909
Why dont you invite him once more, and then announce to the general public that there is a chip missing and you would like it back (can also happen in private). This way you know how much respect he has for it and if he is trying to own his mistake...
 

JScott

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Just talk to your friend. If you guys are really close just say, "Hey, dumbass, just ask next time!" I have an open fridge policy for beers, food (unless labeled by wifey) during poker nights, so my friends know it's ok to grab whatever. So maybe your friend thought you wouldn't care about "cheap" chips? Either way I know it's the feeling of being disrespected that really matters, so again, go talk to your buddy and if he's still being nonchalant about it then fill the room with uppercuts.
You’d have to understand the nuances about our relationship.

it’s complicated, I mean I’m surprised it was him, but then again, I’m not. It showed a lack of respect, which is a bit of a fixture and annoyance in our relationship. He won’t apologize, I already know that. He’ll think it’s no big deal.

also, as good as a fighter as I am, he could take me.


@SaoliverAdmittedly, so am I. I honestly
Think it’s the best way to get the message across.
 

Sambukan

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Why dont you invite him once more, and then announce to the general public that there is a chip missing and you would like it back (can also happen in private). This way you know how much respect he has for it and if he is trying to own his mistake...
Ah forgot that you already mentionned you know how you will deal with it, you are not looking for advice. I Respect that. Sorry this shit happened to you, we all know it would feel to loose a chip like this.
 

JScott

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Ah forgot that you already mentionned you know how you will deal with it, you are not looking for advice. I Respect that. Sorry this shit happened to you, we all know it would feel to loose a chip like this.
No problem, I appreciate the advice. I’m just dealing with it this way. Which is hilarious over a $1 item. But it’s totally a reflection of character. I already have a complicated relationship with this buddy, and we won’t stop being friends, but for now this will work.

what are the reason I made this post was just because I’m surprised I found nothing of the sort when I looked it up. It has not happened to others?
 

Sambukan

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No problem, I appreciate the advice. I’m just dealing with it this way. Which is hilarious over a $1 item. But it’s totally a reflection of character. I already have a complicated relationship with this buddy, and we won’t stop being friends, but for now this will work.

what are the reason I made this post was just because I’m surprised I found nothing of the sort when I looked it up. It has not happened to others?
I do say exactely the same thing to all new players: worst thing you can do is just take a chip, although i do have lots of chiops, it will not go unnoticed. So if you really want a chip please just ask me for it, maybe i can arrange something. I did give out some chips after being asked about it, to two of the regulars at my game. But no never had a chip missing like that.
 
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It's actually a pretty low thing to do. If he wanted one he could have asked. But that's just my opinion. I would definitely call him on it either privately or publicly. Then if he copped an attitude... Never mind lol
 
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All I'm saying is there are kids at my karate school that love my poker chips because I was storing them in my office and I had games at the school at night. Now I moved everything to my home. Point being even 7 and 8-year-olds knew not to take them
 

aggie

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I would definitely message the group that you noticed a chip is missing. That will, at a minimum, provide cover for the buddy who brought it to your attention, and will also send a gentle message to your other guests.
 

FDLmold

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I was teaching chemistry one day, and I gave each group a small $10 scale. I make sure they work before they get them, I count them, and I make sure they work when I get them back. One day I was one short. I gave them a chance to come clean, then threatened getting an administrator down to search bags. A kid pipes up, oh, I just checked my bag, and it "fell" in. Got my scale back. Kid was NEVER a problem after that and found another way to measure his drugs. The key is that if you give them the chance, then leave it be when they give it back, you've earned their respect because now they know you are on top of your shit, and if they try it again and get caught they know they are super screwed.
 

Kensco

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No problem, I appreciate the advice. I’m just dealing with it this way. Which is hilarious over a $1 item. But it’s totally a reflection of character. I already have a complicated relationship with this buddy, and we won’t stop being friends, but for now this will work.

what are the reason I made this post was just because I’m surprised I found nothing of the sort when I looked it up. It has not happened to others?
Some instances listed in here:

https://www.pokerchipforum.com/threads/do-you-discuss-chip-theft-at-your-games.8924/#post-119751
 

Moxie Mike

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I’d give him a chance, maybe he thought you said it was ok. It’s not like he’s hiding it.
maybe send a note out saying you counted your bounties and was short one, just in case someone thought it was ok to keep them and not redeem.
I like this response.

If this guy is a good friend, then a permaban seems excessive. Maybe this can be handled discreetly. Is it public knowledge that the chip is missing?

Looking at it from the other person's perspective... he may have just thought you'd be cool with him snagging one of the chips since it seems as though you own more than you need. I understand the violation you feel... but if he's using it as a golf marker, he probably thinks about you and the game every time he marks his ball. To him it may be a token of your friendship.

I have a relatable experience to share. I host a lot of games and we play in my corporate office after hours when the building is empty. We have branded items all over the office as one would expect.

Well one day a couple years ago as I was washing up a few dishes, I noticed there were only 3 of the branded coffee mugs in the sink instead of the usual 4. I looked around but never found the missing Moxie Mug. To this day there are now only 3 mugs to display next to the coffee maker.

So I just figured maybe it got broken and someone just threw it away. I had no idea how long it'd been missing. So I pretty much just forgot about it.

Fast forward to about 3 months ago, I went over to my buddy's house to have lunch with he and his wife. They both are regulars in the games I host and over time have become good friends of mine. I arrived and walked up to the door and knocked. He answers the door and what's in his hand? MY MISSING MUG filled with freshly brewed coffee!

I laughed... "So you're the one who stole my mug?"

"Yeah I didn't think you'd mind."

"No dude. Those weren't complimentary."

"Oh... sorry then. Do you want it back?" He says with an apologetic tone.

"No you can keep it. It's all good."

37828468_10204644476988411_1305884132038934528_n.jpg
 
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JScott

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Looking at it from the other person's perspective... he may have just thought you'd be cool with him snagging one of the chips since it seems as though you own more than you need. I understand the violation you feel... but if he's using it as a golf marker, he probably thinks about you and the game every time he marks his ball. To him it may be a token of your friendship.
LOL, I can say with quite a bit of certainty that this is not the case.

Also, if someone ever took something of mine because I had "more than I need", they'd never be considered a friend. I have more than I need of basically everything I own, it doesn't mean others can just take it from me.
Here's an even better solution:

Order a replacement, and extras. At the next game, give one to each of the players except him. Say, "You already got one, right?'

Hahahahaha
I didn't ask for advice, but I gotta say, this i hilarious and just may be exactly what I'll do.
 

upNdown

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It's a strange situation. Do you guys drink when you're playing?
You've told us that you always tell everybody not to take a chip. Is it possible that this guy got sick of the warnings, had a few drinks and decided to say screw you and do exactly what you always warn everybody not to do? I don't know, I'm just thinking out loud here. Of course I would never steal a friend's chip, but if a friend warned me before every game not do something I'd never do, I'd probably be rolling my eyes, at the very least.

Anyway, you do you, but I agree with the other guys who suggest you give everybody a chance to return it. Losing a friendship and a player over a $1 chip seems almost as silly as stealing a $1 chip from a friend.
 

Budha

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I have to agree with you on this one JScott - that’s a pretty low thing to do. Not about the value of the Chip at all. My kids know better - lol.

An accident….nah, I gotta call BS on that.

A message the next day saying I ended up with one of your chips, sorry bro, I’ll bring it to the next game easily confirms if it was an honest accident.

Absent that…I find it pretty hard to make excuses for the guy. Bottom line, IF he thought it was OK or not a big deal, why not just ask or at the very least say “Thanks for bringing these for us, very cool!”

Handle as u see fit - lol.
 
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