This sums it up nicely for me. Of course, the respect issue makes me think the friendship may have other underlying things going on. The poker chip may have a greater psychological meaning than it’s monetary value. Until you deal with the underlying issue I suspect this is just a symptom. Of course, separation is also a solution to this problem but again if the poker chip is responsible it is only to the extent the last straw is responsible for breaking the camels back.Losing a friendship and a player over a $1 chip seems almost as silly as stealing a $1 chip from a friend.
To be clear, I don’t warn them every game, I warn new players. So the regulars have heard it more than onceIt's a strange situation. Do you guys drink when you're playing?
You've told us that you always tell everybody not to take a chip. Is it possible that this guy got sick of the warnings, had a few drinks and decided to say screw you and do exactly what you always warn everybody not to do? I don't know, I'm just thinking out loud here. Of course I would never steal a friend's chip, but if a friend warned me before every game not do something I'd never do, I'd probably be rolling my eyes, at the very least.
Anyway, you do you, but I agree with the other guys who suggest you give everybody a chance to return it. Losing a friendship and a player over a $1 chip seems almost as silly as stealing a $1 chip from a friend.
I’m not losing a friend over it. I’m losing a player, and likely not even forever. He’ll be annoyed, but we’ll still be friends.So, being the devil's advocate with my dumb logic. Not trying to be a dick.....
I get it's a situation that can be addressed. I am not gonna argue that one bit. But, would I rather be happy or right? I've started having to ask myself this before I start a battle, because I grew up in a "right fighter" household.... And I've realized it was as the cost of happiness.
I can be right and punish this guy, remove a friend from the game over a single BRpro ceramic chip... Or I can be happy and have my game.
I think you can use this as an example and get the same results without removing a player. I'd talk to him, talk to the group, ask for the chip back, then give him one.... He's going to stare at your confused when you give it back, but then the point is made.
Ask. Be decent. Enjoy the game. The group is a group for a reason.....
Again, do as you wish, but just trying to show a perspective that you could get your goal and keep a player... Along with maybe bring the group in line....
Good luck! It's a hard situation....
I like this response.
If this guy is a good friend, then a permaban seems excessive. Maybe this can be handled discreetly. Is it public knowledge that the chip is missing?
Looking at it from the other person's perspective... he may have just thought you'd be cool with him snagging one of the chips since it seems as though you own more than you need. I understand the violation you feel... but if he's using it as a golf marker, he probably thinks about you and the game every time he marks his ball. To him it may be a token of your friendship.
I have a relatable experience to share. I host a lot of games and we play in my corporate office after hours when the building is empty. We have branded items all over the office as one would expect.
Well one day a couple years ago as I was washing up a few dishes, I noticed there were only 3 of the branded coffee mugs in the sink instead of the usual 4. I looked around but never found the missing Moxie Mug. To this day there are now only 3 mugs to display next to the coffee maker.
So I just figured maybe it got broken and someone just threw it away. I had no idea how long it'd been missing. So I pretty much just forgot about it.
Fast forward to about 3 months ago, I went over to my buddy's house to have lunch with he and his wife. They both are regulars in the games I host and over time have become good friends of mine. I arrived and walked up to the door and knocked. He answers the door and what's in his hand? MY MISSING MUG filled with freshly brewed coffee!
I laughed... "So you're the one who stole my mug?"
"Yeah I didn't think you'd mind."
"No dude. Those weren't complimentary."
"Oh... sorry then. Do you want it back?" He says with an apologetic tone.
"No you can keep it. It's all good."
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If that's what ya got out of what I said. Then you already made the choice. Good luck!To be clear, I don’t warn them every game, I warn new players. So the regulars have heard it more than once
I’m not losing a friend over it. I’m losing a player, and likely not even forever. He’ll be annoyed, but we’ll still be friends.
So this isn't really a post asking for advice since I already know what I'm doing about it, more of a minor rant. But I always host, even when not the "host". I bring my chips, sometimes table, the cards, manage the bank and even deal for the game if I'm feeling up for it. I always told everyone "don't take a chip, if you want one, ask and I'll try to get you a sample set, but I don't want to be short at the end of the night" and they all laugh it off like it's unnecessary to even say.
Well, over drinks the other days one of my newer regulars mentioned that one of the guys took a souvenir. He didn't want to say at first and be labelled a rat, but we convinced him it was worse to steal from a friend than rat out a friend. To my surprise it was one of my good friends, who's using the chip as a golf ball marker. It's a show'em chip I got from BRpro poker so not a huge loss as I can replace easily, and I have many others. Funny enough I hadn't even noticed it was missing as they were new, I only have 10 of that kind, and just kept them in my bank box. Probably wouldn't have noticed for a while if not told. The thing is, I would have gladly given him one, or all of them had he asked for a golf ball marker, and just ordered another 10, but now I'm pretty pissed as it show a complete lack of respect for not just me, but the effort I've put into hosting great games.
I can't confront him just yet as I don't want to throw the buddy who told me under the bus, so my plan is to just not invite him to games anymore, and be clear to my other players that if you steal, you're banned. I also have to warn some of the other golfers apparently now as I don't want them to think it's a free for all on my chips. If the chip thief asks me to host a game at his, or why he's not invited anymore, I'll let him know why and somehow protect the friend who told me... He'll be pissed and think I'm overreacting over a $1 chip, but I'm annoyed he put me in this position in the first place.
I also throw one of, if not the best, game in town, so it's no small deal being banned. And over this:
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I've literally done that...I will wear a Shirt saying "Someone Stole My Chip" in my Next Session with that friend
Unfortunately 3 chips went missing, all customs. I don't know that is is right to bring that up here Bill as the unfortunate owners have come to terms with them being gone... one was openly discussed and that was the Rosie's Bayou 8th pie, Mike said it is very possible it slipped out of his pocket and into the couch, none of us knew about it until after the event... just a damn shame! Unfortunately this chip is not replaceable and from my understanding was one of only like 6 that survived birth from CPC... I didn't even get a chance to see that beauty!What chips went missing?
Are you saying Bergs lives with his Mother?I remember many years ago at a meetup we played with Berg and his Dunes tourney set. A $1000 chip went missing after the tourney. He was on tilt the rest of the weekend. Searching and re-searching every box, nook and cranny where that chip could be. You could tell he figured someone at the meetup stole it.
Turned out his mother was admiring the chips, took one out before he left with them for the meetup and didn't put it back.