Drink the 409
Smash the glass
Dump the disaronno on your head
Use large piece of glass on wrists and neck
Eat smaller pieces of glass
Stick finger in outlet and let alcohol assist
If you can't tell, I've had a fucked up week too.
P. S. Please don't do any of the above.... they are my ideas
(obligatory smiley to denote tasteless fictional narrative post)