Looking For Actual Advice (and a few of the ineveitable jokes) (1 Viewer)

[Quicksilver-75]

So after four kids and in an effort to not become confused with some of our local Mennonite families whilst at the farmer's market...I'm getting a vasectomy.

Tomorrow at 10:30 am I will officially become "Steve Light". A lower calorie, lower protein version of my old self.

So other than a bag of peas and tight underwear is there any advice others would care to offer?

 

[spikeithard]

 

[krafticus]

meh, I had it done a few years ago. I played poker the next night and binked it. Day one, take it easy. Day two, a little more. Day three, back to business.

Mark

 

[Mr Tree]

I had the same experience as Krafticus. They are so efficient with them now that you are up and running pretty fast and the pain isn't really that bad at all. Just take it easy and don't push anything on day one and you will be fine.

 

[tommythecat]

Been thinking about getting this done myself. I am 36 with no kids and would like to keep it that way. Have had some close calls in the past and would really like to avoid it in the future. Glad to see that it is a pretty easy procedure to deal with.

 

[LabMonkey]

My experience echoes the others. Day one a little sore, just R&R. After that, you'll start feeling like your normal self pretty quickly.

 

[Quicksilver-75]

Well thanks guys. I imagine like anything that is painful, it's worth it. After my two boys were born only a couple years apart I told my wife "if our next one is a girl I'm getting snipped. If it's another boy I'm cutting my junk right off!" it's already like a frigging dojo around my home with constant karate fighting. I can't imagine what having three boys separated by a couple years would be like.

 

[spikeithard]

I think I am shooting natural blanks- too much use of the hottub growing up and drinking mountain dew hahaha

 

[DrStrange]

I was stunned after reading this article from Nate Silver's 538 site. Basically a man can render himself much less fertile just by wearing "tightie-whities" for a few months.

The sample size is small but even so the results are nothing less than breathtaking.

http://fivethirtyeight.com/features/men-those-tightie-whities-really-are-killing-your-sperm-count/

Take your chances if you want, I bought a drawer full of boxer shorts -=- DrStrange

PS and for what it is worth, I have three boys with five years separating the oldest from the youngest. That meant I was Scout Master for a L O N G time.

 

[BGinGA]

Thanks for the link, DrStrange - I would never have guessed the extremity of the effects.

I'd guess that wearing tight briefs, keeping your cell phone in your pocket, actually using your laptop in your lap, and going for an hour bike ride once a day is probably cheaper than a hospital visit to get clipped -- and nearly as effective. Plus it's reversible, and less chance of infection, too.....

 

[liftapint]

Isn't the most popular time for this procedure, the first 2 days of the NCAA basketball tournament? I've heard (though no reference to back up my claim), that this procedure is done with much higher frequency during the March Madness tournament, so the snip-ee can recover while watching game after game after game. Makes perfect sense to me!!

In a related idea -- I heard a very funny thing from a friend of mine yesterday. "You need birth control? Just go listen to a middle-school band warm-up for a performance".

 

[Quicksilver-75]

Every time I come back to look at the thread I see this pic and I just start to chuckle....

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Isn't the most popular time for this procedure, the first 2 days of the NCAA basketball tournament? I've heard (though no reference to back up my claim), that this procedure is done with much higher frequency during the March Madness tournament, so the snip-ee can recover while watching game after game after game. Makes perfect sense to me!!

In a related idea -- I heard a very funny thing from a friend of mine yesterday. "You need birth control? Just go listen to a middle-school band warm-up for a performance".

Damnit! Why didn't I think to have this done during the NHL playoffs????

 

[bergs]

It also helps if you get repeatedly hit in the groin during martial arts tournaments. Eight (8) trips to the ER including 2 where they wanted to transfer me to the OR (and one occasion where I actually knocked a doctor out cold in the ER, for something completely and wholly justified). So, if you don't want to get snipped, just have someone repeatedly crossing-side-kick you in the junk.

 

[Bloody Marvelous]

It also helps if you get repeatedly hit in the groin during martial arts tournaments. Eight (8) trips to the ER including 2 where they wanted to transfer me to the OR (and one occasion where I actually knocked a doctor out cold in the ER, for something completely and wholly justified). So, if you don't want to get snipped, just have someone repeatedly crossing-side-kick you in the junk.

I recommend going this route.

 

[spikeithard]

I am 32, single and no kids. I have a great life balanced of work, lifting weights, poker and golf. Where are those tighty whities I gave up back in grade 9?!

 

[detroitdad]

meh, I had it done a few years ago. I played poker the next night and binked it. Day one, take it easy. Day two, a little more. Day three, back to business.

Mark

same here. The doctor said to drink a bunch of fluids that first day. I asked if beer was fine. He said yup. I picked up a twelve pack, rented some movies, and called it a day.

 

[manamongkids]

Hope you dont change your mind

 

[Shaggy]

no big whoop

 

[Hot Nuts]

After having triplets you'd think I would have done it, but no. Safe so far and I wear briefs. My boys need a house.

 

[Leonard]

Well, I've only had the one vasectomy but I've done a few thousand in the last twenty years....
I also note that by now the cutting is over and you are likely at home sitting on an icebag or a sack of frozen peas....

Take it easy for the next few days and you will be fine.

Don't go for a long horse-back ride or go water skiing in the next day or so, although I've had patients do both of these.

L

 

[Ben]

Don't go for a long horse-back ride or go water skiing in the next day or so, although I've had patients do both of these.

Also, stay away from PVC pipe. Very important...

 

[QuiQuog]

I was stunned after reading this article from Nate Silver's 538 site. Basically a man can render himself much less fertile just by wearing "tightie-whities" for a few months.

The sample size is small but even so the results are nothing less than breathtaking.

http://fivethirtyeight.com/features/men-those-tightie-whities-really-are-killing-your-sperm-count/

Take your chances if you want, I bought a drawer full of boxer shorts -=- DrStrange

PS and for what it is worth, I have three boys with five years separating the oldest from the youngest. That meant I was Scout Master for a L O N G time.

Seriously? I've been in tighty whities since I've been out of diapers (a couple years). It didn't stop any of the three kids I had.

As far as the OP, there isn't much advice needed other than just be sure you want it. The procedure is quick and is only uncomfortable when they're numbing you up. There may be some intermittent mild residual pain for a few months, but it goes away.

 

[Mr Tree]

Also, stay away from PVC pipe. Very important...

OMG I had very nearly forgotten about that and now that image is back in my head.

 

[krafticus]

I don't think I was actually cut. Just clamped shut. TMI??

 

[guinness]

Yeah as mentioned hopefully you are doing fine. I had a beer and a chipotle sandwich right after mine and I wanted to go running that night. I totally nursed the fact that I took 3 days off from work and had the wife getting me everything I need while I binge watched television. "ahhhh the life..."

 

[Quicksilver-75]

Yeah. It turns out it wasn't that bad. Possibly the worst part was when he was cauterizing the tubes. I could see smoke and smell bbq whiffage except I knew it was coming from my groin..*barf*

Hopefully the bruising goes away soon. It looks like a cement truck parked on my Johnson.

 

[iblonger]

If you listen the recovery goes well, or so I have heard. I didn't really listen and it took a while to recover.

 

[links_slayer]

If you listen the recovery goes well, or so I have heard. I didn't really listen and it took a while to recover.

No personal experience with this but a buddy of mine tried to play hero and shovel 14" of snow the morning after he got snipped. They swelled to the size of softballs. Dude was in a lots of hurt for about two weeks. We laugh about it now because he's okay but damn....

 

[iblonger]

I waited the two days like I was told, and decided that I should hang a privacy fence since I had some extra time off of work. In the process I tried to stomp crack a piece of wood. The force of my foot hitting the ground caused pain the like of which I hope to never have repeated. I could not walk for three weeks because of said swelling. The doctor did find humor in the fact that im an idiot.

No personal experience with this but a buddy of mine tried to play hero and shovel 14" of snow the morning after he got snipped. They swelled to the size of softballs. Dude was in a lots of hurt for about two weeks. We laugh about it now because he's okay but damn....