Funny Player Nicknames (1 Viewer)

guinness

Flush
Joined
Oct 30, 2014
Messages
1,252
Reaction score
1,755
Location
Hard Luck Herotown
Poker is one of the best environments to find nicknames, simply because people are very loosely connected and the most minor of things can re-brand you. Sometimes the stories behind the name are not obvious (viffer) while others are obvious (k9dr) and others not so obvious but maybe obvious (Chicken Rob). Post here some of the funnier names we run across that go beyond "Old Man Phil" or "Bobby Brakes" (actual players in my home game).

Here are a couple names at a raked game I play locally to kick things off:

Back to Front
We had a highfalutin discussion about ass wiping when a player said he wipes back to front. Everyone is confused, his name is now Back to Front.

Hooker Chris
The name is obvious but the stories are great. He is in his mid 30's and has hired over 200 hookers. The stories are better told live but this guy is a piece of work. He insists on shaving between his raisins and his donut before the opening act of getting licked there while he goes to town on himself for 20 minutes. His descriptions on how the vets handle it vs n00bs kill us.

Okay now that you're nastied out, what are the more normal funny names you got?
 

jbutler

Royal Flush
Joined
Oct 28, 2014
Messages
10,669
Reaction score
10,636
wiping back to front is about a billion times grosser than banging 200 hookers. although hooker chris could probably give some manscaping tips to BTF to make the wiping a little less disgusting.

we have the typical "docs" (a podiatrist and a gynecologist) and "5 finger pete" (caught sneaking money out of a pot some years back) and "joe screws" (guess what he sells) but the only one in my current game with a truly non-standard nickname is Matches. he banged a girl who later told the game his dick was the size of a matchstick. matchstick is a little unwieldy as a nickname, so it became Matches. he still doesn't know why.
 

BGinGA

Royal Flush
Tourney Director
Supporting Member
Joined
Oct 29, 2014
Messages
25,795
Reaction score
40,047
Location
Atlanta
Just two nicks in our group. One guy is eee-aww, obv donkey reference. The other goes by Lazarus, because you just can't finish him off in a tournament - no matter how dead you think he is. Has a penchant for hanging around (often with just a few chips) for several levels longer than ever seems possible, yet often amassing enough chips to eventually become a threat to win.

Still chuckling about Matches, though.... lol
 

Jeff

Full House
Moderator
Supporting Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2013
Messages
4,993
Reaction score
8,100
Location
Chicagoland
T. Rex - the guy has short arms and never can collect a pot or cards without help.
 

Mesnik44

Two Pair
Joined
Nov 7, 2014
Messages
474
Reaction score
539
Location
Port Coquitlam, B.C.
In my group this is what we have:
Preach - He showed up and someone commented that he looked like a preacher. It stuck.
Polio - She tends to cripple people, and not take them out of a tournament.
*** the Jew - Self explanatory. It's not derogative, he actually gave it to himself.
Bubbles - A few of us work with this guy, and someone gave him a Christmas present that looked like a chocolate donut, but was actually a bar of soap. Well he bit into it, and the rest is history.

Of course, just like when I was in the military, if you do something dumb, you get a nickname that will stick.
 

Wifey

GEAR LABELS
Site Vendor
Joined
Nov 12, 2014
Messages
288
Reaction score
1,170
Location
Canada
In my group this is what we have:
Preach - He showed up and someone commented that he looked like a preacher. It stuck.
Polio - She tends to cripple people, and not take them out of a tournament.
*** the Jew - Self explanatory. It's not derogative, he actually gave it to himself.
Bubbles - A few of us work with this guy, and someone gave him a Christmas present that looked like a chocolate donut, but was actually a bar of soap. Well he bit into it, and the rest is history.

Of course, just like when I was in the military, if you do something dumb, you get a nickname that will stick.

What about Math Kid? (Crazy math skills, he can divvy up an Omaha HL pot in no time flat!)

And Bambi??? (The baby of the group)

And Greek? ( thought he lost a big pot in Greek Holdem, and folded face up...to show the winning hand... )

And we may not have a nickname for you per se, but there is nary a game when your favourite citrus isn't mentioned! [emoji13]
 

slisk250

Straight Flush
Joined
Dec 9, 2014
Messages
7,885
Reaction score
13,120
Location
Rocky Mountain High
Otis - fun guy to play with and he drinks like Otis Campbell. When he would start falling asleep during a game, he would put himself to bed on the couch...just like in Mayberry Jail.

Chair Crusher - One of my very big friends and he only plays when he hosts...no one else has a chair that can handle his action.

Big Timer - Kind of like chair crusher but much smaller and he is always in the middle of the action regardless of the activity. He is a big timer.

The Asian Mr. Magoo - needs no explanation.
 

Gear

Full House
Site Vendor
Supporting Member
Joined
Oct 31, 2014
Messages
4,431
Reaction score
7,184
Location
Mission BC Canada
Preach - He showed up and someone commented that he looked like a preacher. It stuck.

Actually someone asked me "So, what's your nickname gonna be?" and I reacted with "Oh dear Lord." Hence, preacher.

I've played with Long Blink, who does just that - seems to be asleep for minutes at a time, but then wakes up and groggily wins. Drives me up the wall.
 

Leonard

Flush
Joined
Nov 3, 2014
Messages
1,083
Reaction score
2,614
Location
United States
Sticky Fingers (Sticky for short) - Will not fold. He loves the name.

We have a T. Rex too, for the same reasons, but it's more a description than nickname

L
 

rowlin

Full House
Joined
Nov 1, 2014
Messages
2,552
Reaction score
2,559
Location
PNW
Not sure how funny these are, but two of our original players call each other "Ethnic" and "Cultural." I think it refers to which parent bestowed their religious affiliation upon them.
 

Mental Nomad

Full House
Joined
Nov 7, 2014
Messages
3,640
Reaction score
2,458
Location
NJ - NY/NJ metro area
"Two-Fiddy." We had a regular $.50/$1.00 game, and the $.50 fracs were only in the game for the small blind. But guess what Two-Fiddy liked to raise to?
 

Schmendr1ck

4 of a Kind
Supporting Member
Joined
Nov 5, 2014
Messages
6,199
Reaction score
14,201
Location
Orlando, FL
Not many nicknames in my group, and some are merely plays on real names.

"Reasonable Mike" is a friend & coworker of mine who takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r on every single decision. He will also spaz out at least once per session on a nonsensical bluff.

"Admiral Ackbar" no longer plays with us. His nickname was both a play on his real name and a warning that when he bets big, it's a trap.
 

Mesnik44

Two Pair
Joined
Nov 7, 2014
Messages
474
Reaction score
539
Location
Port Coquitlam, B.C.
What about Math Kid? (Crazy math skills, he can divvy up an Omaha HL pot in no time flat!)

And Bambi??? (The baby of the group)

And Greek? ( thought he lost a big pot in Greek Holdem, and folded face up...to show the winning hand... )

And we may not have a nickname for you per se, but there is nary a game when your favourite citrus isn't mentioned! [emoji13]


Can't forget Cuzzin Dean either! He's everyone's cuzzin!
 

guinness

Flush
Joined
Oct 30, 2014
Messages
1,252
Reaction score
1,755
Location
Hard Luck Herotown
Human Toilet
The raked game I play is in an old New England mill building, you go through corridors then knock on a fictitious company door before 4 cameras are on you to let you in. Although there is a private bathroom, one of the guys ran out to go down a corridor to use a shared bathroom. This mill building is gritty... all companies that make dust and metal and so forth. Anyways, he runs into this porn star in the bathroom, all dolled up and everything (CA, NV and NH are the only states in the US that allows making pornography for commercial purposes). Unbeknownst to us, a studio was down the hall. He's like "whoa" and after a 20 year marriage that dissolved a year prior, he ends up making films with this chick, including... taking sips of her nectar. Hence... the Human Toilet.

Racist Eddie
Is it funny that the host of of the game is black, yet a person shows up and goes into tirades about all things ethnic on a regular basis? He's so forthcoming that its like you're watching a TV show that isn't real. Nobody agrees with him, yet people seem to shrug him off regularly. He's a nice guy, aside from his views on the non-white race. :confused:
 

pokerplayingpisces

Full House
Joined
Dec 6, 2014
Messages
2,772
Reaction score
6,856
Location
Mile High City, CO
The other goes by Lazarus, because you just can't finish him off in a tournament - no matter how dead you think he is. Has a penchant for hanging around (often with just a few chips) for several levels longer than ever seems possible, yet often amassing enough chips to eventually become a threat to win.

We have a guy just like that in my Thursday night group. We call him "the cockroach, or la cucaracha". When he's down to 5BBs, or less, he'll just shove "in the dark", if he's in one of the blinds/ or UTG. Once side action is finished, he almost always seem to flip over the winning hand (Whether it's a small set he caught on the river, or 58o, for the winning straight) He takes his triple or quadruple up, and usually starts making a strong run.

- - - - - - - - - Updated - - - - - - - - -

Two others from our Thursday night group;
HOOKS- his name is JJ, plus he's the only person on the planet I know that consistently wins with pocket jacks.

SUCK OUT MIKEY- pretty self explanatory. He really doesn't care about position, size of bet, who made the bet, etc. He just plays his hand. That being said, I've never seen anyone else call large bets PF, and post flop with nothing. No hand, no draw, "just a feeling". Only to go runner, runner, and take a large pots from the original raiser. 9 times out of 10, he's one of the first couple players out. But if he's catching, he'll play about anything. He's very analogous to "Crazy", from Dr. Strange's strategy threads.

That's all we have. Not nearly as funny as some of the previous posts in this thread.
 

daschuck77

Pair
Joined
Nov 4, 2014
Messages
214
Reaction score
246
Location
Hampton Roads
Not really a nickname but one guy dresses like a Community College English teacher and is overly methodical and sometimes dramatic at the table when making decisions. I like to rib him by asking what takes longer, deciding to call/raise/fold, or grading papers?
 

Gear

Full House
Site Vendor
Supporting Member
Joined
Oct 31, 2014
Messages
4,431
Reaction score
7,184
Location
Mission BC Canada
SUCK OUT MIKEY- pretty self explanatory. He really doesn't care about position, size of bet, who made the bet, etc. He just plays his hand. That being said, I've never seen anyone else call large bets PF, and post flop with nothing. No hand, no draw, "just a feeling". Only to go runner, runner, and take a large pots from the original raiser. 9 times out of 10, he's one of the first couple players out. But if he's catching, he'll play about anything. He's very analogous to "Crazy", from Dr. Strange's strategy threads.

That reminds me of another player in our games - Plunger, or just Plunge, named for that sucking (out) sound you hear on the river when he's in the hand.
 

pltrgyst

Royal Flush
Supporting Member
Joined
Mar 29, 2013
Messages
10,174
Reaction score
14,991
Location
FL
On the ordinary side, I used to list seats for my games on a Web page using first names and last initial. Inevitably, a dupe arose, so the second Dave M became Dave M2. He's pretty widely known now simply as "M2".

Another guy is pretty universally believed to have walked off with six or so of my chips one night. He was dubbed the Pink Panther, usually shortened to Pink.

A good friend in the game (who several of you know) is a very outgoing ex-rugby player, about 6 ft 2 and 325 pounds, balding, with curly hair on the side of his head. His nickname, naturally enough, is Buffalo.
 

Racer96

Flush
Joined
Aug 12, 2013
Messages
1,358
Reaction score
2,149
Location
Canada
Not an official nickname, but it seems like a lot of people at the tables call me asshole.

They always say they mean it in the nicest possible way though.

Mike
 

TexRex

3 of a Kind
Joined
Aug 8, 2013
Messages
685
Reaction score
520
Location
Texas
I liked the T Rex nicknames. Nicknames are not common in our poker game, but I sometimes get called T Rex. My name is Rex, and I from Texas. I got the name while going to school in Virginia Beach while on a softball team, and the name stuck. Some shorten it to T Rex. I don't have short arms though, so I'm either a dinosaur or a monster according to some. But in the game, hardly anyone ever calls me that.
 

Mesnik44

Two Pair
Joined
Nov 7, 2014
Messages
474
Reaction score
539
Location
Port Coquitlam, B.C.
Not an official nickname, but it seems like a lot of people at the tables call me asshole.

They always say they mean it in the nicest possible way though.

Mike


Nah Yoshi,

When I call you an asshole at the table I mean it.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
JUST KIDDING!!!
 

Leonard

Flush
Joined
Nov 3, 2014
Messages
1,083
Reaction score
2,614
Location
United States
Not really a nickname but one guy dresses like a Community College English teacher and is overly methodical and sometimes dramatic at the table when making decisions. I like to rib him by asking what takes longer, deciding to call/raise/fold, or grading papers?

We have two players that occasionally get called HRD (human rain delay).

L
 
Top Bottom