When you let yourself down with a bad decision (1 Viewer)

upNdown

upNdown

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I choked.
The mechanics don't matter much. But I was close to the cash at a mtt but I made a call for all my chips, for maybe some good reasons, but it was absolutely stupid decision, given my cards and my stack and how close I was to the cash.
Stepping back with perspective, it was a horrible, awful, inexcusable call. And the bottom line is that after 7 hours of good, solid play, in the one moment that mattered, I choked.
I don't know if I'm looking for advice or commiseration or what. But it's just so frustrating for me when I know that good decisions are what separate me from the rest of the idiots, and when it mattered in this moment, I totally choked and made bad decision and let myself down.
 
I have definitely been there before. Mtts are such a grind and its easy to make 1 mistake after 7 hours. Sometimes something as little as a card protector that you associate with taking an extra few seconds helps. But we all do it, so don't beat yourself up too badly.
 
Jimulacrum said:
All you can really do is learn from it.

Important question: Why did you make the bad decision? What overrode your otherwise sound judgment?
Click to expand...
I've thought about that and thought about that. There were reasons for the call, but they were independent of the big picture of the situation that should have screamed "fold now, stupid."
So the only answer is a loss of patience, which is especially painful because patience is what I've thought to be my biggest strength and my strongest tool in this type of tournament.
 
Here, let me help......

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Sounds like you donked off your chips after someone made a bad call with their holdings and smashed the flop. The end result or details of the hand doesn't matter as much as your take away. Posting your regret indicates that your decision(s) may have been uncharacteristic based upon your experience. Some of this may be chalked off to frustration in the moment, pressure of running deep and relative stack sizes, inadequate rest, or a combination of factors. It is important that you identify as closely as you can the "trigger" that put you in this situation. (If there is a teachable moment - define it, and then move beyond it.)
 
upNdown said:
I've thought about that and thought about that. There were reasons for the call, but they were independent of the big picture of the situation that should have screamed "fold now, stupid."
So the only answer is a loss of patience, which is especially painful because patience is what I've thought to be my biggest strength and my strongest tool in this type of tournament.
Click to expand...

Then derekdd23's advice is probably the kind of thing that would help you moving forward. Or meditate during breaks, or whatever.

Patience is super-important in (most forms of) poker, and since it's a sort of psychological battle with yourself, it can be one of the hardest aspects to master. You truly can never get so good at patience that you don't need any further training.
 
Actually, would be quite helpful for you. But it's probably best if you just stayed out of personal dynamics you don't understand.
 
I took this one so hard because patience was the reason I was there. This was a tournament with 40 minute levels - I was excited because I was sure I could be more patient than the rest. And I was for 7 hours. I wasn't getting cards, but I hung in and I grinded and with 21 people left (out of 100) I was sitting on a hard fought for 20 big blinds.
People had tightened up, so I made a move for the blinds and antes with a stupid A5o.
A guy who had just gotten coolered out of over 50 big blinds shoved with his last 20. It folded back to me. I figured he was frustrated and impatient and my ace was probably good.
If I just folded, I would have had 15 big blinds going into the final 2 tables (with a $20k prize pool)
It was so colossally stupid, especially because that's not my game. I can sit on 15-20 big blinds for hours, patiently picking my spots. But I blew it.
 
upNdown said:
But it's just so frustrating for me when I know that good decisions are what separate me from the rest of the idiots, and when it mattered in this moment, I totally choked and made bad decision and let myself down.
Click to expand...

Don't be too hard on yourself. Lots of idiots still cashed.
 
WedgeRock said:
Don't be too hard on yourself. Lots of idiots still cashed.
Click to expand...
This idiot didn't.
You gotta learn from this stuff and move on. And I sit here trying to tell my myself that that wasn't a lesson I needed. But clearly it was.
Guess I'm not Phil Helmuth.
Yet.
 
upNdown said:
I took this one so hard because patience was the reason I was there. This was a tournament with 40 minute levels - I was excited because I was sure I could be more patient than the rest. And I was for 7 hours. I wasn't getting cards, but I hung in and I grinded and with 21 people left (out of 100) I was sitting on a hard fought for 20 big blinds.
People had tightened up, so I made a move for the blinds and antes with a stupid A5o.
A guy who had just gotten coolered out of over 50 big blinds shoved with his last 20. It folded back to me. I figured he was frustrated and impatient and my ace was probably good.
If I just folded, I would have had 15 big blinds going into the final 2 tables (with a $20k prize pool)
It was so colossally stupid, especially because that's not my game. I can sit on 15-20 big blinds for hours, patiently picking my spots. But I blew it.
Click to expand...


Was your Ace good?
 
They say being a major league baseball closer is one of the most mentally difficult jobs in sports. One errant pitch and you blow all the hard work your teammates have put in for the last nine innings. You will be roundly booed and criticized by thousands of people you've never met through all manners of media, not to mention having disappointed the people you care about the most.

Then tomorrow you're expected to get back on the hill and pretend that never happened.

Point being you can't get hung up on it. Learn from it and then forget about the incident. It's really that simple (except that it's not).
 
I kind of agree with @BGinGA. You should stew over this for a while and let it bother you A LOT, so you can learn from it and embed that learning in your poker war chest. We've all been there. I can't count the number of times I was driving home from a tourney or a cash game, mad at myself for that last bust-out hand. It's all part of the love/hate relationship we have with this game :mad:
 
upNdown said:
Yeah, right up until he turned over his pocket queens.
Click to expand...

So you made a read and it was wrong, this time. It happens. If you're read was correct and you doubled-up you'd have a nice stack and could mix it up for a top spot. Or could keep folding to a min-cash. I guess how bad your decision was is based in-part on what your goal was.

For the record, I probably wouldn't have called. But, if any of the people I play poker with knew anything at all about poker, they'd call me a weak/tight nitty nit. That's why I only make friends with poor poker players.
 
It sucks when it happens and I think everyone has had that one bad decision while playing poker. And, as bad a cliche' that it is... it is probably not the first time and it will surely not be the last time this will happen. Just like when i called off my stack at PLO with 2nd set a few weeks back. Doh! Don't beat yourself up about it. I would put it in perspective, though. We all have bad days and good days and I think its better to have a bad day playing poker than the many other things that can happen as a result of a bad decision (eg. injury or life ending). Enjoy poker and don't dwell.
 
At the end of the game, the king and the pawn go back into the same box.

So there's that, at least.
 
Willpower is finite. Recognizing and being honest with yourself about your emotions as you play is central to the game.
 
bigdonkey said:
So you made a read and it was wrong, this time. It happens. If you're read was correct and you doubled-up you'd have a nice stack and could mix it up for a top spot. Or could keep folding to a min-cash. I guess how bad your decision was is based in-part on what your goal was.

For the record, I probably wouldn't have called. But, if any of the people I play poker with knew anything at all about poker, they'd call me a weak/tight nitty nit. That's why I only make friends with poor poker players.
Click to expand...
You could look at it that way, but with my style of play, in that position, it should have been a fold. I don't mind being a nit at that point in a tournament, being so close to the cash.
 
I like that you were active when others seemed to tighten up, but making it 5bb to go seems excessive (even with antes) with your effective stack. You are able to steal a wider range (like A5o) when you open for less, and won't so easily feel pot committed when get raised. As played you were getting pretty good odds (15 to win 25+) and given your read that was an easy call IMO. If your read was off, then that's certainly something to think about and try to improve... But if villain had 86s and you won the pot, would that change how you feel? :coffee:
 
trever said:
Willpower is finite. Recognizing and being honest with yourself about your emotions as you play is central to the game.
Click to expand...
Believe me, I'm trying. I figured out another factor. I had just been moved to that table and was dismayed to see that one of the biggest donks around was sitting there with the big huge stack. He's the kind of guy who will play any two cards, so he's impossible to put on a range. I remember thinking about how annoying it would be to try to make up ground with that particular idiot pushing a big stack. It was definitely in my head at that time and that must have contributed to my losing focus.
 
mipevi said:
I like that you were active when others seemed to tighten up, but making it 5bb to go seems excessive (even with antes) with your effective stack. You are able to steal a wider range (like A5o) when you open for less, and won't so easily feel pot committed when get raised. As played you were getting pretty good odds (15 to win 25+) and given your read that was an easy call IMO. If your read was off, then that's certainly something to think about and try to improve... But if villain had 86s and you won the pot, would that change how you feel? :coffee:
Click to expand...
I was using round numbers. I believe at the time, I had 58k. Blinds were 1500/3000 with 300 ante. And I opened for something in the 8k range - maybe 8500? So just under three bb's actually - probably a bit light when you figure in 7 antes.
 
Ok, 2.5x-3x seems fine to me. Now folding to a raise should be a bit easier, and you still have enough to keep stealing those blinds & antes. (y) :thumbsup:
 
You might try reading Every Hand Revealed by Gus Hansen. It is instructive to see how he analyzes and reacts to hands.
 
trever said:
You might try reading Every Hand Revealed by Gus Hansen. It is instructive to see how he analyzes and reacts to hands.
Click to expand...
I'm in the middle of it. He's the one who's got me stealing antes. Now if I could only remember to fold . . .
 

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