I was playing in a tournament and check-raised - fold to re-raise. Not the best play I know. I was stealing and got caught.
If you never get caught stealing, you aren't doing it often enough.
The player to my right demanded to see my cards.
Tell him to fuck off, or reply with your offer to comply (ie, "Give me $100 to show, or fuck off."). You are under no obligation to disclose the contents of your hand, and assuming action was complete and the hand was over after you folded, it is your option to show your folded cards or not before being mucked by the dealer , and/or to ask for compensation to show if you choose to do so.
Completely irrelevant to the discussion. He could have been the dealer, your opponent who won the hand, the tournament director, another player at the table (with or without a live hand), or your freakin' mailman. Makes no difference.
I tossed them in the muck. He pulled them out and showed everyone. What's the rule?
Well, for homicide, I think it's a minimum of 20 years to life imprisonment in most states without the death penalty. Probably 3-5 years for aggravated assault, depending on how badly his arm is broken and whether or not you have a sympathetic poker-playing judge.
His action is NEVER acceptable, and one that seriously risks bodily harm. No player should ever go through the muck or attempt to retreive cards; those dead cards belong to the dealer -- who can't do it either, unless instructed to do so by the TD (tournaments) or Floor/Casino Manager (cash games). Violating that rule will invoke an immediate warning or even disqualification or removal from the property.
Tl;dr --
- You are under no obligation to show.
- Players are not allowed to dig through the muck for any reason.
- Doing so risks bodily harm and/or expulsion from the game.