"A mouthful of STFU"

grebe

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Playing Friday night in the regular tournament game. Not my favorite game, but most people are pretty friendly and it's close to home. Oh yeah, I also run crazy good here. It is mostly older guys, retired with at least some amount of money. I am one of those crazy kids in this game....at a mere 49 years old. My image is a guy that can play the game, and I am perceived as madly aggressive (I'm not, but they all think I am). I realize I am an outsider to this game as these guys have been playing together for decades, so I try to be very polite and modest and NEVER show anybody up. I do like to joke around a bit though, and if left unchecked, I can be a wise ass. All that being said...

We combine tables and I am next to a big older guy, retired cop and Army guy. I have seen this guy get verbally aggressive with a couple people before....he is for sure a hot head. Has a flat top hair cut....enough said. He is SB, I am BB and I flop an open ender when it was just us two in a hand that went call/check. He bets big into me...I say something about not wanting to draw and let him take it down. He says "good fold" and shows me 84 for nothing. I say something back about what good fold, he says "good for me!" I answer back "well that's not very nice". His next comment is this: "how about you go into the kitchen there and get a nice big mouthful of SHUT THE F*** UP, or we can take this outside". I put my hands up and submit, and say nothing. He says "that's what I thought."

Nobody at the table says anything about this or to him. Not. A. Damn. Word. Me included.....I really don't know how far this dude is willing to go. The table is dead silent for a complete orbit. (The host is playing cash game in a different room and isn't aware of this at all).

Next orbit, he is SB and I am BB again, it once again goes check call, I have 92. flop comes out 984. He bets, I call. Turn 3, he bets I call. River 2, he bets I shove and he insta calls and shows Q9. I show him the bad news, he shoves the chips to the middle and tries to cash in his bounty chip....I tell him "No, that's mine too" (it's optional). He puts it on the table and storms out the back door....NOT the way anybody else leaves this place.

I let things settle down for a couple hands, then announce to the table "that felt good" hoping for comic relief, but not even a chuckle. Now I'm a little nervous about this dude.

Discuss...
 

SixSpeedFury

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My immediate response after dragging in his chips would've been exactly what he said: "how about you go into the kitchen there and get a nice big mouthful of SHUT THE F*** UP!" I know you're supposed to be the bigger person in situations like that, but fuck that. Fuck that tool.
 

Ben8257

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Seriously man... not a bad beat... he limps in, good ole BBSpecial. Flop top pair, that's cards man... I'm guessing he didn't come back? Worried this will carry over to next time? Maybe hire @Lil Tuna as a body guard just in case!! Sorry to hear that Brother!!
 

slisk250

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Playing Friday night in the regular tournament game. Not my favorite game, but most people are pretty friendly and it's close to home. Oh yeah, I also run crazy good here. It is mostly older guys, retired with at least some amount of money. I am one of those crazy kids in this game....at a mere 49 years old. My image is a guy that can play the game, and I am perceived as madly aggressive (I'm not, but they all think I am). I realize I am an outsider to this game as these guys have been playing together for decades, so I try to be very polite and modest and NEVER show anybody up. I do like to joke around a bit though, and if left unchecked, I can be a wise ass. All that being said...

We combine tables and I am next to a big older guy, retired cop and Army guy. I have seen this guy get verbally aggressive with a couple people before....he is for sure a hot head. Has a flat top hair cut....enough said. He is SB, I am BB and I flop an open ender when it was just us two in a hand that went call/check. He bets big into me...I say something about not wanting to draw and let him take it down. He says "good fold" and shows me 84 for nothing. I say something back about what good fold, he says "good for me!" I answer back "well that's not very nice". His next comment is this: "how about you go into the kitchen there and get a nice big mouthful of SHUT THE F*** UP, or we can take this outside". I put my hands up and submit, and say nothing. He says "that's what I thought."

Nobody at the table says anything about this or to him. Not. A. Damn. Word. Me included.....I really don't know how far this dude is willing to go. The table is dead silent for a complete orbit. (The host is playing cash game in a different room and isn't aware of this at all).

Next orbit, he is SB and I am BB again, it once again goes check call, I have 92. flop comes out 984. He bets, I call. Turn 3, he bets I call. River 2, he bets I shove and he insta calls and shows Q9. I show him the bad news, he shoves the chips to the middle and tries to cash in his bounty chip....I tell him "No, that's mine too" (it's optional). He puts it on the table and storms out the back door....NOT the way anybody else leaves this place.

I let things settle down for a couple hands, then announce to the table "that felt good" hoping for comic relief, but not even a chuckle. Now I'm a little nervous about this dude.

Discuss...

Sounds like a fun group of guys, might as well go to the casino.
 

Lil Tuna

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I'd ask someone in the game that you know well how you are perceived. That reaction seemed over the top in both cases, and that no one stepped in to mediate at all is odd. Especially with a "seasoned" audience that tends to be more diplomatic.
Can’t say I know who your talking about Chris. I haven’t played at Bubbas in awhile.
I don’t think he’d of let that go on had he known.
 

Frogzilla

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I always try to defuse and avoid confrontation wherever possible regardless of who is in the wrong. Is he joking with you? Or is he genuinely wanting you to shut up because of some needles? If it’s me, and that’s the reaction I’m getting, I quit needling him for the rest of the night for sure. I would not make any comment at all that insinuates he made a poor poker decision “let me get there”, “what’d you think I had”, “I had you on top pair”, etc, just coolly state my action and win graciously. If I knock him out there I say “good game” sincerely without smirking.

Also what is this about the bounty chip being optional
 

upNdown

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I'd ask someone in the game that you know well how you are perceived. That reaction seemed over the top in both cases, and that no one stepped in to mediate at all is odd. Especially with a "seasoned" audience that tends to be more diplomatic.
This.
The fact that nobody acknowledged your little comment at the end would make me wonder if you are generally disliked. Not sure what to do with that info if it’s true, though.
 

LotsOfChips

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Nobody at the table says anything about this or to him. Not. A. Damn. Word. Me included.....I really don't know how far this dude is willing to go. The table is dead silent for a complete orbit. (The host is playing cash game in a different room and isn't aware of this at all).

Discuss...
Could be that they're a bit intimidated by him, know that he's a hothead, and don't want to poke the bear... Or could be that they thought you had it coming.

Did you get any vibe that they were annoyed by your comments, or were they all looking at their shoes, trying not to upset the asshole?

I let things settle down for a couple hands, then announce to the table "that felt good" hoping for comic relief, but not even a chuckle. Now I'm a little nervous about this dude.
Again, hard to know from your description if they are scared of the guy or think that you're the asshole. Worth checking out (ask the host how you and the other guy are perceived, or maybe just ask the table if you were out of line with your comments)
 

Moxie Mike

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I let things settle down for a couple hands, then announce to the table "that felt good" hoping for comic relief, but not even a chuckle. Now I'm a little nervous about this dude.

Discuss...

So you waited for the bully to leave before saying something snide? The way you make it sound is that everyone is terrified of him and no one will stand up to him.

Is the guy always like this? Or was this a one off?

How important is it to you to continue getting invited back? If you DGAF about getting invited back...

Disclaimer: I'm probably the wrong person to dispense advice on the topic of talking shit, because I would take it to the absolute extreme. If it were me, I would absolutely eviscerate this guy in front of everyone.

"Take this outside? Take what outside? Whaddya want to blow me in the parking lot? We don't have to go outside for that. You can suck my dick right here at the table. But this time, no teeth rakes please."

In case you're wondering, yes I've said exactly this to someone who was acting like an asshole at a casino, and yes, I always choose the nuclear option. Anyone who's seen @toynoob, @davin or @Beakertwang and I go at it can verify this. So I realize I've probably contributed nothing to this discussion. Moving on...

EDITED to add: I would not go to this extreme at someone's home if I were the new guy, nor would I go out of my way to start a fight.
 

shorticus

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I'd say
1.) I would have had a problem with him telling me to STFU in an aggressive manner especially if you don't know me, but unless you're the type of person prepared to fight, then you have to brush that off and move on.
2.) Because your reaction to 1 is not that of someone who is belligerent, your best bet after you win the hand is to say good game and move on. Making a snide remark can only go South for you in this situation. Too many negative outcomes when you are not looking for one. Example (stretching it): Suppose everyone laughs at your comment and the guy overhears it, or someone comments, "yeah, that guys really an asshole" and he gets wind of that. You are now in a situation that you probably don't want to be in.

I'm kind of in the majority here with thinking you may need some information of your image with the group. Especially if they knew you were trying to make a joke and they didn't laugh. Maybe someone thought you were wrong, but maybe they just don't like you (the latter would suck). My last question would be regarding your profitability at this game. If you're not profitable, it's entirely possible that they may not like you, but they do enjoy your money. I hope I'm wrong about everything in this final paragraph.

-Shorticus

P.S. Please don't listen @Moxie Mike . He's 100% accurate about his poker convos, but for all we know, Mike might be a weekend MMA fighter lol.
 

slisk250

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"Take this outside? Take what outside? Whaddya want to blow me in the parking lot? We don't have to go outside for that. You can suck my dick right here at the table. But this time, no teeth rakes please."

I’d amend #1 to be “Don’t be a smart ass with anyone (especially someone you don’t know).

I can't decide which one of these I love best!
 

trever

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1. This confrontation started before the hand, he's ticked at you already, you just didn't notice
2. Showing his bluff was supposed to put you in your place, but you didn't act like he expected you to
3. When you kept talking, he ran out of responses so he went to one of the canned catch phrases that he's used for years
4. He totally will fight you over this because it is about his pride, not the cards
 

grebe

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-I think I know my image, but I could be wrong. If @Lil Tuna wants to make a 3rd party phone call, "Purple Rain" was at the table and would have a great read on how people perceive me in the game. I have no problems with him calling to ask what's up. I could also call him myself. I think the dude's name is Mark. I'm sure he knows who.

-No booze, this is an almost straight sober game. Some younger players smoke weed at the breaks, but nobody drinks.

-Optional bounties...I don't know what to tell you. House rules. There's also an optional high hand contest, but it didnt come in to play here.

-I mentioned it after the fact to him, he said, you gotta fight your own battles. Like I said though, in this game, I am perceived as ultra aggressive and I win. I am sure that rubs some people wrong. I have had a couple other minor issues here, but just from somebody talking regular shit and me saying something back. Nothing major.

-As far as how much of a smart ass I am here, I am waaaayyyy worse at Seeking Alpha's game, because that's all shit talking fun people. It's fun, that's all. This game I try to mind my manners.

-As far as wanting to fight, I don't want to fight anyone. Win or lose, bad things happen in fights and I have a family. I am not one to just be pushed around but so far though.

-I could just bow out of the game, but it's a fun game. That also means the bully beats me. And, these guys play all the time and I could get invites to other games that are local.

After thinking about this for a bit, my gut is to call up the host, who is a really nice guy and just talk to him. I won't make any demands or draw lines in the sand, but I would like to know what this dude is capable of. Is just a bag of hot air, or do I have real concerns here. The fact that he has cop connections weirds me out.
 

grebe

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Also real quick....I did not needle him. I told him what he did wasn't nice....in kind of a joking manner, but I said it politely. That was our first interaction of the night. He came over the top after the statement, "that wasnt very nice". He bluffed me, then gloated about it. that's what I said wasnt nice. (this statement seems ridiculous when talking about adults)

The second hand I beat him and I said nothing....except for the bounty chip was also mine. He left and did not come back. I made the "funny" comment after he was gone. People still didnt think it was funny.

Just to keep the facts straight.
 

Lil Tuna

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-I think I know my image, but I could be wrong. If @Lil Tuna wants to make a 3rd party phone call, "Purple Rain" was at the table and would have a great read on how people perceive me in the game. I have no problems with him calling to ask what's up. I could also call him myself. I think the dude's name is Mark. I'm sure he knows who.

-No booze, this is an almost straight sober game. Some younger players smoke weed at the breaks, but nobody drinks.

-Optional bounties...I don't know what to tell you. House rules. There's also an optional high hand contest, but it didnt come in to play here.

-I mentioned it after the fact to him, he said, you gotta fight your own battles. Like I said though, in this game, I am perceived as ultra aggressive and I win. I am sure that rubs some people wrong. I have had a couple other minor issues here, but just from somebody talking regular shit and me saying something back. Nothing major.

-As far as how much of a smart ass I am here, I am waaaayyyy worse at Seeking Alpha's game, because that's all shit talking fun people. It's fun, that's all. This game I try to mind my manners.

-As far as wanting to fight, I don't want to fight anyone. Win or lose, bad things happen in fights and I have a family. I am not one to just be pushed around but so far though.

-I could just bow out of the game, but it's a fun game. That also means the bully beats me. And, these guys play all the time and I could get invites to other games that are local.

After thinking about this for a bit, my gut is to call up the host, who is a really nice guy and just talk to him. I won't make any demands or draw lines in the sand, but I would like to know what this dude is capable of. Is just a bag of hot air, or do I have real concerns here. The fact that he has cop connections weirds me out.
I can investigate if you like but I think it would be much more satisfying to you to hear an honest answer from someone who was there.
Call up Purple and ask him his straight up opinion. Tell him not to sugar coat it, he usually doesn’t but I’ve known him for years.
I literally haven’t played that game in 5-6 years.
 

upNdown

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Also real quick....I did not needle him. I told him what he did wasn't nice....in kind of a joking manner, but I said it politely. That was our first interaction of the night. He came over the top after the statement, "that wasnt very nice". He bluffed me, then gloated about it. that's what I said wasnt nice. (this statement seems ridiculous when talking about adults)

The second hand I beat him and I said nothing....except for the bounty chip was also mine. He left and did not come back. I made the "funny" comment after he was gone. People still didnt think it was funny.

Just to keep the facts straight.
Sure, but as @trever suggested above, it seems like he was already pissed at you. Either for other things that happened at the table or maybe for a previous game.
 

grebe

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I can investigate if you like but I think it would be much more satisfying to you to hear an honest answer from someone who was there.
Call up Purple and ask him his straight up opinion. Tell him not to sugar coat it, he usually doesn’t but I’ve known him for years.
I literally haven’t played that game in 5-6 years.
sure, I will call him.
 
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